Imagine there was a platform for women to be able to reach out to experts on any topic, any time. Can you imagine how that would empower a lot of women to get out of difficult situations, improve their lives, or even start their own business? That’s what WIN WIN Women is all about, and the superwoman who birthed this idea, Dr. Paula Fellingham, has her eyes set on the prize – this is going to be an international organization. In this episode, Dr. Paula shares what they have achieved with WIN WIN Women so far and what her vision is for the community she has built out of passion and networking magic. Tune in and be inspired by this Grammy who does it all!
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WIN WIN Women: Connecting Women And Experts For Meaningful Change With Dr. Paula Fellingham
I’m excited that you continue to tune in, share with your network, and subscribe to the show week over week. I’m even more excited to have a special guest on. She’s not only my friend but she’s my business partner too. We have partnered with each other. Let me please welcome Dr. Paula Fellingham. Dr. Paula is the Founder of WIN WIN Women. Don’t we women need more wins? Of course, we do. She is a global mentor with a Doctorate of Education degree and a recipient of awards from three US presidents.
Paula has written eight books. I’ve only read three. Not only that, but she has also co-presented over 400 live events in 152 nations. She has achieved all of these accomplishments by giving birth and raising eight children. All of my female business colleagues and owners, when you say, “Michelle, I can’t do it.” Yes, you can. Dr. Paula has done it, and so can you. She’s a granny of 24 grandchildren, and she has a wonderful and very tight family. Please give a warm welcome to Dr. Paula Fellingham. Welcome to the show, my friend and partner. I’m pleased to have you here.
Thank you so much. I’m delighted to be here, Michelle.
Thank you. Before we get into asking some in-depth questions and getting to know what is WIN WIN Women and how did you come up with it, let’s talk a little bit about your background. Who is Paula? What were you like as a little girl? How did you get here?
I was blessed. I grew up in Southern California. My father was an entertainer, performer, comedian and musician. His name is Wendell Noble. My maiden name is Noble. My mother was like Mary Poppins. I’ve had many challenges since then, but my growing-up years were magical. I instilled in my heart the love of music. My undergraduate degree is from Occidental College in Los Angeles in Music. My minor was in Physical Education. I taught high school for two years, and then we started our family, but I didn’t want to raise them. My husband didn’t want to raise them. My husband and I met when we were twelve. That was fun.
We married after we graduated from college, but nonetheless, we met when we were twelve. We’re high school sweethearts. He was the valedictorian. He was a student body president. That was before Title IX. For those who are younger, that means before they allowed women to be in sports. I was a cheerleader, but I would love to have been in some of the sports because I love sports. I taught high school and then we decided not to raise the kids there.
We went up to the Olympic Peninsula in the beautiful state of Washington. We were on 7 acres, a little mini farm. I was having more children and teaching them how to sing and dance and perform. Long story short about the performing years, we did perform professionally, living in Maine, and coming back in September for twelve years.
We performed in 42 states in the US and then in Europe and at the United Nations. Last summer, we performed 273 shows. That’s five a day and six on the weekends, playing ten instruments. When you travel with your family and you have these wonderful experiences, thousands of hours in rehearsal and being together and performing through those twelve years, you become very close. All my children, except one, live within a few miles of each other. It’s their comfort zone for us to all be together. It’s such a blessing, and unusual in a sense.
You’re the true sound of music.
I wish I had a dollar every time somebody said that. We had seven costume changes. It was a true variety show, but mostly, we did country bluegrass and then we did a patriotic, but we did a set from the ‘30s, ‘40s, ‘50s and ‘60s, but mostly country bluegrass. Banjos, mandolin, keyboard, bass, drums, fiddles, and absolute fun. That’s why I encourage many of our sweet women who are in their rearing-the-children ages to do something, whether it’s karate or hiking. Whatever it is, do it as a family. Try to do something that you are connecting and working together as a family.
It certainly builds our family bond. It makes children realize that I always have my family.
After those performing years, when our kids were 3, 5, 7, 9, 11 and 13, my husband decided to get his PhD. That’s why we’re in the beautiful State of Utah. I would’ve stayed up there forever. Now we are in the lovely State of Utah. He has taught at a university for 32 years. Our children now have had their children and still having children. I’m excited about the possibility of doing what we’re doing together. How that came about was that after the performing years, I still had all this energy and drive, and thanks God, my health, which I have been blessed to have all these years. I’m 73 years young.
After the performing years, having been in front of many thousands of people on stages, I segued into becoming a professional speaker. I started writing more books and loving my time on stage and then started speaking all over the world. We had already performed internationally. I went out. When I started having those new experiences, then I got addicted to the women of the world and started to realize that there are many women who need our help. I started the Women’s Information Network, which I grew from 2008 until a few years ago.
You asked about this story, “How did you start Win Win Women?” The Women’s Information Network was all education based. That’s where I co-presented all those events all over the world, taking children and grandchildren with me, but having these wonderful experiences, and falling in love with the women of the world. At the same time, realizing a few years ago after doing all these things and traveling, and being around the world many times on all these stages, it’s like squeezing little drops of water into a huge ocean of need because I knew the need of the women of the world. I knew their hearts.
By this time, I was well acquainted with women in many nations, 152 nations. I thought, “How can I help them on a bigger scale?” Into my heart came this knowing. I honor all religions. I know a lot about every major religion in the world. I honor their beliefs. I’m a Christian and I pray. I’m not ashamed at all to say that in prayer. It was just a feeling. “It’s not about you, Paula. It’s not about you at all. You need to go find the wonderful experts of the world, women who are experts in health and fitness, parenting, self-development, and all the things. You need to give them a platform.” That is our beautiful women’s global multimedia network, Win Win Women.
I started reaching out to my friends. You reach out to your friends first and then beyond that and beyond that to find women who I’m giving a platform. The beauty is that we have eight different platforms. We have our website where all these women share their expertise, their message, whatever it is that they are experts in, and the message that they had to share with other women. I sometimes get the question, “Why not the men?” I said, “It’s okay to niche to half the planet. This is my niche.”
By the way, ladies and gentlemen, there are 3.9 billion women on the planet.
My question was, “How can I reach all of them with no woman left behind? You heard in the military, “No man left behind.” How can we reach all of them? Here’s the good news, never until now in the history of the world has there been the ability because of the beautiful technological progress that has been made for us to even be able to do this. This is what it looks like. It looks like an expert sharing a message in a one-hour segment once a week. She shares for 15 to 30 minutes, and then the remainder of the hour is actual interaction with the audience. You turn off the recording and then whoever is there is able to ask questions to connect with those experts. How beautiful is that?
No one else is doing this. There are lots of presentations being given, but there’s no one who has created a network like Win Win Women, which is WinWinWomen.com. All our shows are on WinWinWomen.tv. To be able to create a network where women can interact with each other any time of the day or night is what we’re building. Right now, we have two channels that are about twelve hours a day. This is the dream. The dream is to have any woman in any nation at any time of the day or night, being able to interact with an expert for free on any topic. That’s the goal. That’s what we’re building.
We launched in January 2022. We’re growing quickly because here’s our formula, women win when they receive solutions. Experts win when they provide solutions. There’s the Win Win Women. Our first goal is 50 topics because we could always expand that. We’re scalable. We have 50 topics and then every hour of every day for seven days, that’s 168 presentations on each topic. That is 50 topics times 168 in the vertical. That’s 8,400 presenters.Women win when they receive solutions. Experts win when they provide solutions. That’s what WIN WIN Women is all about. Click To Tweet
The other great news is that we are working on simultaneous translation. Our sisters who are our experts in every nation speaking any language would be able to teach. We’d click English or Spanish or French, and then someone else would click Hindi or Arabic, but they can be speaking in Arabic, Hindi, or any language and we would click English. It’s magnificent. That is being built.
I can’t wait to see my presentation in Hindi.
That will be fun. They’ll read it. As Michelle knows, our great plan also is to take this and franchise it, partner, and license it out. We’re growing this now. We’re in development to be able to have this in every nation. It’s Win Win Women India and Win Win Women Brazil. This is part of our future. This is the plan. This will happen as fast as it’s right. That was a lot of information. You probably have other questions, Michelle.
There’s a lot to unpack there. It’s amazing. One thing that amazes me, the more I get to know you and the business is how you’re able to get employees and partners to buy into the vision, and not just work for a paycheck. Many employees are like, “What are you going to give me? What are you going to pay me? What are my benefits? What is this? What is that?” They buy into the vision and they’re in it with you as a partner. Even though they’re an employee or 1099, they’re with you as a partner helping you because they see your vision, they buy into your vision, and they become part of the vision.
It becomes their vision.
Zig Ziglar always says, “You don’t build a business, you build people and people build a business.” Many business owners right now are struggling to try to get the right people and retain the right people. Why don’t you explain your method on how you are doing it? I don’t think I’ve ever seen it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone do it better than you.
Thank you so much. That’s why we’re partners. Here’s the beautiful thing about experts, every expert that I’ve ever met has had the experience of helping to change a person’s life. We know that the person must change from the inside out. They need to learn about the agency and controlling their thoughts, words, actions, and all those pieces. However, when an expert can have someone say, “What you taught me changed my life,” and you have one experience like that, then you think, “I can not only change that person’s life. I can change hundreds of lives. I can change thousands of lives.” When we then say, “Come and help us reach 3.9 billion women on this planet.” They’re like, “I’m in,” because they’re driven.
The ones we want to have with us are driven by a love for their sisters and women worldwide, or they wouldn’t be with us. The money is wonderful. It lasts long and it helps you serve others and bless your family and all those wonderful things. What drives them in the core of their hearts is the change that can be brought into the lives of the women whom they’re teaching. We are education based. I started telling your audience about the opportunity to be on the website. The other seven platforms are Roku, Amazon Prime, Apple TV, and stages all over the world, which I’m going to come back to and tell you about International Women’s Day. We put on events all over the world.
You took my question out of my head. We’re on the same page.
Everybody who has a message wants stages, and they want to be able to share it with small groups, medium, large, and millions. I love the online because it allows us to do this, be where you are, be where I am, and be where our audience is, and to be able to have them watch it after. Here’s the magic. The magic is when you have a live event. That’s why I was excited about putting on live events all over the world, those over 400 live events in these many decades, but then being able to say, “We can move this online.” There has been a part of me that misses those live events because there’s an interaction of our spirits, our souls, and our connection heart to heart.
It works beautifully here. It works better in person. It’s my experience. What I love are these live events. Segueing into that, I am blessed to not only own anything online with the two words, Win Win, because I own the trademark, but I also own this wonderful InternationalWomensDay.org. I’d love to tell them about that. Is that okay if I do that now, Michelle?
Yeah, you can do it now. I wanted to unpack a few things that you said real quick. Number one, I love what you said when you said people want to connect. I listen to Joyce Meyer every day, plus all of my clients. People are lonely. Even CEOs and CFOs. People at the top of their game are lonely. Money doesn’t buy happiness. What is happiness? Happiness is connecting, helping other people, and being a blessing to others. Many people are lonely around the world. You don’t have to be. Somebody said to me, “Michelle, I got a million followers on Facebook, but I’m lonely.” I’m like, “Those are not your followers. Those are not your friends.” That comment that you made is huge. That’s what’s important. That’s one of the biggest reasons I bought into your vision.
Thank you. It’s true. Our motto for Win Win Women is, “We care, we connect, we collaborate.” We do care about all women, all cultures, all beliefs, and all women. What’s beautiful is we connect heart to heart. That’s the way to have a sweet connection. We collaborate to help them grow their businesses and be successful financially and collaborate in other ways. We do help women make money, which is a good thing.At WIN WIN Women, we care, we connect, we collaborate. Click To Tweet
Not only make money but maybe deal with terrible relationships they’re in. You covered the globe. Every subject there is on demand, you’re covering that. Your maiden name was Noble. Dr. Paula Fellingham gets the Nobel Peace Prize.
Bless your sweet heart. Thank you.
You’re going to be a huge inspiration to many women even if we touch one woman. That’s why I’m excited to be a host on your platform as well. Think about if we touch one woman and help her get out of a difficult situation. We helped one woman improve her life, one woman starts a business, and one woman exits a business. I can’t think of any bigger accomplishment than that.
This is about the women of course. I’m blessed to own InternationalWomensDay.org. Some of you don’t understand or might not know the history. I’ll tell you quickly. International Women’s Day started in 1911 in Europe. The United States is only 1 of 42 nations that do not have it as a national holiday for everyone. In all these other nations where I go, International Women’s Day, which is March 8th every year, the kids get out of school, and people get out of work. It’s a national holiday and it’s exciting. They have parades. It’s a big deal.
The United States caught on to it about twenty years ago, and it’s 120 years old. We started celebrating it, but it’s still not nearly as big in the US as it is in many other nations. It’s a perfect time for us to be able to gather together. What we did was a virtual event on March 8th, 2022. As per our Google Analytics, we had over one million women come to our virtual event. We added two days, March 5th and March 8th, 2022. We had 42 speakers. They were all in our shows. We give our show hosts many opportunities.
In 2023, it takes my breath away because we’re going to have a live event in Delhi, India. There will be 10,000 women there just for you to know. You may know this, but I know a lot about India. In 2019, I put on seven events from Southern to Northern India, and 30,000 women came. These are live events. These are not virtual. That was the sixth time I had been to India. I do know the people there. There are 600 million women in India. India is 1/3 the size of the US and three times the people. There are 700 million people in the US. There are 600 million women in India.
That puts you in that perspective.
It’s exciting because there is a beautiful arising and awakening of women of the world, especially in India. It’s more fast-moving and far-reaching than anything that has happened in the history of the world as women, in general, are becoming more and more educated. The middle class is growing. We’re able to see many women starting their businesses and becoming experts. We’re like, “Why wouldn’t we give them an opportunity to share their messages? Why don’t we have International Women’s Day there?” A third of India speaks English.
I reached out to Paul Singh. He has a long name. He’s the director of the Sikh religion in the whole Western Hemisphere. He is a dear friend. I said, “Let’s do a beautiful event there for women and involve all the major religions and all the women.” Those who have been to India know that it’s a spiritual nation. They care a lot about their beliefs and they integrate them into their lives better than many of the other nations of the world. Having it there is perfect. We’ll have a huge screen and it will be live-streamed to millions of women worldwide.
What I love is that you can go right now to InternationalWomensDay.org. You could read about it. You could sign up to be on our priority list. We’re able to then have women who are joining us virtually from all over the world. I invite you right here to get on an airplane and join us physically in Delhi. I’ve already invited Michelle. I’m hoping she’ll be able to be there with me in Delhi for this magnificent event. It’s six days, March 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th. It’s that Saturday or Friday night, and through the next Tuesday and Wednesday. We’re excited about this opportunity to then celebrate on a massive level.
What I haven’t told you about are nonprofits. I’m blessed to have founded a nonprofit that we will work right with it. Our mission is to increase the level of love, prosperity, and peace on Earth. That’s the mission of the nonprofit. With Win Win Women and with these other wonderful entities, we’re going to put on the largest event in the history of the world for International Women’s Day that’s ever been put on International Women’s Day. We’re excited about that.
That’s amazing. I can’t wait. I can’t pick a better partner whose eyes I would like to see India through other than yours. It’s going to be exciting. Let’s talk a little bit about the host part of it. One thing that I love is that you have a platform for women business owners or whatever their core competency or superpower is. For them to go on to your platform and educate other women and help other women is brilliant.
Before the pandemic, I spoke a lot. I was an international keynote speaker. Sharon Lechter and I had a lot of events planned out, and then it shut down. I got into speaking. Many women struggle to try to get into events, trying to get into speaking, trying to get hired as a speaker, and so on and so forth. You’re helping two sets. You’re helping business women entrepreneurs find their voice, have a platform and be able to educate other women. How can women get started with you?
It’s easy. They go to WinWinWomen.com. When you go to that home page, read about it. There’s a little button up at the top of the menu that says Become A Show Host. That takes you to a page where you watch my video that tells all about becoming a show host. You read about the benefits. You click to apply because you have to apply. After you apply, then you’re able to schedule a call with one of the members of our executive team to be able to answer any of your questions about what it would be like. What I would love to share with all of you is that this is a platform like none other to be able to get your message out to the world. There is a cost and you’ll learn about that on the website.
We’re very upfront. What we have is a way for you to share it once a week, but then multipurpose it. Here’s what we do. We say, “Take that.” We allow you and we make it easy for you to take that presentation. After your show episode, we call them shows and then each week is an episode because we’re a network. There are many definitions of the word network. You could take your show and then episodes. You can put them on your website or put them on your YouTube channel. Strip off the audio and make it your podcast. You can use it any way you want.
Some of the women say, “I spend so much time working on each of my episodes because I’m taking all of the content and turning it into my next book.” Every week, they’re writing a book because they’re already spending the time to create their script. Some talk like we are right now. You can have interviews. You can give any information you want during that time that will bless the lives of your viewers. We are able to then say, “When you’re ready, we put you up on television.” We have 72 women right now up on Roku, Amazon Prime, and Apple TV. Together, those are in 80 million homes just in the US. It’s probably more than that, but it’s exciting to create your own tv show.
When you go speak at an event, you’re lucky to be in front of 100 people. If you can be on TV and be in front of 80 million homes, it doesn’t get much better than that. It helps build credibility. It helps your brand awareness and brand recognition. To me, it’s a no-brainer because it’s tough sometimes for women to get their voice out there, and for women to be heard and showcase their core competencies.
There are a lot of people who start podcasts, and then they are 5 or 6 podcasts in or 10 or 20, and they give up. They say, “I don’t have an audience. This is taking so much time.” When you know that you’re doing a video show like this, it’s on Zoom. You do it from the comfort of your own home and you are able to do a show and then use it in many ways. In your signature, I’m a television show host. Why would a woman who has a message to share not be a show host on Win Win Women?
Your company also helps prepare them, train them, and keep them ready. It’s not like they show up one day and try to speak up on TV.
We have a weekly training. It’s the speaker and business development school training that we have. Since we launched in January 2022, we’ve been doing these weekly. Anyone who comes on now has a plethora of training. We teach you about everything like looking into the camera, being enthusiastic, and having great lighting, all the technical pieces of it and the part that helps you connect with your audience heart to heart. It’s all there. We have a show host area that has training. There are many things that we can teach them not only about how to do this well online, but be a professional speaker. That’s something that has been in my wheelhouse for decades. We’re able to help you with your speaking career. We then give you events.
Here’s the other exciting thing. We’ll teach you how to put on your own events. Why wait for somebody to invite you to be on a stage when you could put on an event? Because I’ve put on over 400 live events in 152 nations, I know a bit about putting on events for not very much money. You could put on events and make money by doing that. Also, that brings you great credibility when you put on events. I’m going to give you a little sneak peek. Starting in January 2023, we are inviting all of our show hosts to put on one event a year, whether it’s with 1,000 women, 100 women, or 10 women.
Here’s what it will do. When you’re a show host and you put out messages about your event, it’s the marketing. They’re going to hear about you and your show. They’re going to come to the event or not. Even if they don’t, it’s raising awareness of you and your message and Win Win Women. There’s a win-win. We have hundreds of show hosts right now. The exciting thing about this is we grow to 8,400. Imagine 8,400 events a year because that’s one event a year by a show host. I’ve already had some show hosts who have put on multiple events because they’re like, “Why wouldn’t I put one on every quarter? It keeps top of mind of the people in my community.”
The first one had a few. She had about 15. The next one had 45. The next one had 150. This is what happens. I know it to be true. We help you every step of the way. We give you every document you need, even to get your venue free. We never pay for venues. If you’re paying for a venue for your event, you’re doing it wrong because you don’t need to.
You’re talking about live events, not Zoom events.
You’ve never paid for a space at a live event.
You teach them all of that too.
I do. We know how to do this.
Not only are they learning how to become a better speaker but they are also learning how to be on tv. Speaking in front of a stage and speaking in front of a tv are two different things. Who does the editing of the show? Do you all assist with the editing of the show?
We don’t edit the show. It’s live. Don’t edit your show. So what if you bumble a little bit? You say, “Easy for me,” or say whatever you want. I don’t know if you’re like me, but every once in a while, I lose a thought and it’ll come back in a minute. It endears you to your audience. It’s authentic. It’s in real-time. They know it’s live. Why would you pay for editing and spend time editing? Put it up. The good news is if you want it, you can.
Also, if down the road you get better and better, some of our shows have said to my team because they don’t put up their own shows, we put up their shows, “I need you to take down these five episodes because I’m so much better now.” They use the content from that episode, the things that they taught, and they redo it and do it again. We’re flexible because we want our show hosts to be doing their best.
Part of what we do is help women worldwide, that includes our show host, achieve a level of excellence, which is not perfection, in every area of their lives, mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually, financially, and all their relationships. Those are the only seven areas in a woman’s life. We offer all of that. You see how I took a little break there and my voice did that little thing. I would never go back and edit that because it’s like, “That’s life. That’s her. That’s real. This is life.” It’s good. It’s okay to be live up close and personal.WIN WIN Women offers women a chance to achieve a level of excellence in every area of their lives – mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually, financially, and in all their relationships. Click To Tweet
There’s no such thing as perfect anyway.
Are you kidding? There’s no perfect family, person, community or anything. We all do our best and we work on achieving a level of excellence because nobody wakes up on a Tuesday morning and says, “I want a mediocre day. I want to live a mediocre life.” I’ve never met a person who says, “I’m fine with not caring at all about improving my life.” Maybe I’m running in the wrong circles of those who care about improving their lives, the majority of people in the world want to improve their lives.
Go through those seven things again that you talked about. You rattled that off quickly.
Here’s what I know. People can listen faster than you can speak. People hear that. They might want you to go back and list the things, but those who speak too slowly lose people online. It’s true. Mental is the first one, and then physical, emotional, social, spiritual, financial, and relationships. Those are the seven areas in our lives.
In that order?
No order. You want to improve your relationships. I listed that last, but it’s probably the most important of all.
What else do you share with us for the women’s network? It sounds fabulous.
We do this. It’s for your audience to know. When Michelle and I get together, it’s so much fun. I would love to take you up to a higher level. I would love for us to go now, and I could have started with this. I’m trying to eliminate the word but from my vocabulary and replace it with an and. One of my sweet partners, her company is Petite2Queen. I thought, “I love this because we’re always thinking queen down to petite.” She’s really good with going from petite to a queen.” Anyway, let’s go up to the 50,000-foot level.
At the time that we are connecting, collaborating, touching the hearts, changing the lives, educating, and all those things for hundreds of thousands, and then into the millions of women, how is it going to affect the nations? I think about that. Think about this. If more and more women are educated, won’t there be more female leadership throughout the world? Absolutely. More and more women right now are becoming leaders. It’s still pathetic statistics around the number of women in leadership positions and many nations, for the US, in Congress and the Senate.
Two percent of all the money given by venture capitalists is given to women. That’s pitiful. Yet 74% of the businesses that are started right now in America at least are women-owned businesses. We’re not talking about equality. I’m not talking about gender equality. I did mention that, but that’s not what our focus is. Our focus right now is saying, “How does this affect the economies in the nations of the world?” It’s to have more females in leadership and better access to education. When there are more women in a decision-making positions, don’t you think more women and girls will be able to be educated?
I’m not thinking about America right now. I’m thinking about many of the nations that have great barriers to women relative to education, and leadership positions in their corporations. Think about that. It has been statistically proven, and I need to let you know that my husband has his PhD in Biostatistics. That’s what he has taught all these years, statistics. I know academia and I know that whole wonderful world of statistics and research. It has been researched that those nations that have the largest number of female leaders have better economies. You can prove this. You can go and find that. Their economies are healthier. They’re stronger because of the women’s input and because of what women bring to the table.
There’s a beautiful book written by researchers that’s called Sex and World Peace. They only put in sex because the editor said, “We can’t put in gender,” so they put in that. They laugh because they’re all academic. It goes through the whole book, talking about the history and research nowadays about the why’s behind the situations that most nations are in right now. We talked about education and leadership so that the economies of the entire nation will improve. When women are educated, stronger, and more confident, they are more happy and will have stronger families. When women know more, they can be more and act more. They’ll read more. They’ll be able to learn more.
They then are able to access information about how to be highly effective parents, mothers, wives, sisters and daughters. This whole relationship piece will increase. It’ll be better worldwide when women are able to gain access to those experts who teach it through Win Win Women and other places. When women are educated, that’s one of the byproducts. That’s stronger families. What sings to my heart is the last one. I believe that when women are in a position of leadership, they have confidence and more knowledge and they are happier. They’re living their best lives, which is a cliche but I love it, then there will be greater world peace.
This world will not have as much conflict because women will be in those places where they can have more influence and impact on the decisions that are made. I care a lot about peace in the world. That’s why I started the Global Prosperity and Peace Initiative. It’s ProsperityAndPeace.org. You could read about that. One of our projects is called Women of Excellence Women of Faith. It’s all faith, all beliefs, and all religions. I care a lot about the future of this world. When I see what’s happening, then my heart hurts because I believe that if we had more women in positions of leadership and decision-making positions, it wouldn’t be as much in the situation that it is in the place where we are with so much conflict. That’s a higher level of the answer to, “Why are you doing it, Paula?”
That was my next question.
I love it. I must because in my heart is this great desire to truly empower, in the greatest sense of that word, the experts of the world to take their place and say, “I want to teach you what I know about how to prevent problems, prevent abuse, prevent suicide, or whatever it is.” It’s all these things that we teach to prevent negative things that are happening. We must because we can.
If that’s not powerful why, I don’t know what is. It’s the importance of why, Paula. When I talk to my clients who are looking to sell their company for millions and buyers who are looking to acquire, I always ask them, “What is your why? Why are you trying to sell this company for $100 million, $1 billion?” Whatever the number is. Explain the power of why.
If people don’t have a why, they’ll burn out. If people don’t have a why, what they do won’t be as meaningful. A powerful why. If they don’t have a powerful why, then at the end of the day, they’re just chasing the almighty dollar or whatever it is. It’s not something that is sustainable. Yes, chasing the dollar is sustainable to some, but what I mean is in your heart of hearts and in your soul, if your why is powerful that you know that because of your why, there will be a great improvement, no matter what your business is, you want to have a huge why to make a powerful impact in your area of expertise, whatever that is.No matter what your businesses you’re in, you want to have a huge why to make a powerful impact in your area of expertise. Click To Tweet
If you don’t, you’ll burn out and you won’t have that passion. I told you this when we first talked to each other, which is quite a while ago, Michelle. I said in my heart there’s this sound. Why? It’s because I know the pain that millions of my sisters and their daughters are experiencing at this minute all over the world. When I know that I can gather wonderful experts who can help alleviate their pain and make their lives easier, why wouldn’t we do it? Unless you have a powerful why, then what are you doing? I’m sorry, but I want to ask that question. Your why is everything.
I talk about people’s whys in my book, Exit Rich.
I read it cover to cover. Everyone in my team has a copy of this. I’m sending them copies because we are working with Michelle, but also because there’s such truth there. I like to tell people about two books now, this Sex and World Peace. Find books that shift people. Your book, Exit Rich, shifts people. You’ve told me that many women don’t begin with the end in mind. That’s a little bit of a mistake, but the good news is you’ve got Exit Rich and she’s got this. I read it word for word, cover to cover. I put it down, bought a copy for my COO, and started buying more copies because we’re both committed to your plan of how we can take this to the world faster.
I’m committed too. That’s why I’m a partner. I can’t even imagine a better partner than you.
Bless your heart. There’s the win-win.
Every day, we’re creating win-wins. Anything else that you would like to share about the Win Win Women’s Network and your global company?
I invite anyone who’s tuning in to come to WinWinWomen.com and read about it. Join us either as a show host or as an audience member on our beautiful shows.
Before we leave, can you share maybe three golden nuggets or tips for struggling women? They are like, “Is this ever going to pass? Am I ever going to feel better? Is this ever going to get better?” It doesn’t have to be entrepreneurial women, it can be any woman.
When someone says to me, “Can you boil down what you’ve been teaching women all over the world for all these decades?” I say, “Yes. Love yourself. You are a daughter of God. He wants you to be happy. You can be happy no matter what’s happening around you. That’s a choice” I haven’t talked anything about some of the great heart-wrenching sadness that brought me to my knees. I say to women all over the world, if you’re going to be a leader, you have to have had experiences that take you right down to the bottom. All you could do is take your next breath. That’s where you are. That’s where I’ve been. It’s a good thing because you have prepared yourself to be able to love others better, and to be able to be a global mentor.Love yourself. You are a daughter of God and He wants you to be happy. Click To Tweet
In my world, to be able to go either virtually or in-person to those women who are struggling in such deep pain and say, “I understand your pain.” It might not be the experience they’re having. It might not be one you’ve had, but you can say without a shadow of a doubt, “I understand your pain because I’ve been in pain. I’ve been where you are. Let me lift you up.” When women can love themselves, their whole world opens up. That’s number one.
The number two is to avoid the disease of the three C’s. Here are the three C’s. 1) Comparing. Women are so good at comparing, “She’s got this. She’s got that. I should be this.” You’re enough. Stop comparing yourself with others. 2) Criticizing. It becomes a habit. Women are like, “I don’t like the weather. I don’t like the president. I don’t like this. I don’t like that.” Stop. Why are we doing this? Live in gratitude. If you had been where I’ve been, in the deepest slums, the most dense slums are the slums of Keber. They’re outside Nairobi, Kenya, Africa. I’ve been there many times and helped lift some of the women out of those slums. There are 1 million people living in 1 square mile.
They have little. When women are complaining and criticizing, I’m like, “Are you kidding me? Look what you have.” It’s the comparing, the complaining, and the criticism. Those are the three. The complaining is some women say, “I don’t understand why my husband doesn’t love me as much as he did when we were married.” I say, “Are you the same woman you were? Are you cherished by your husband? Unless you cherish him, you can’t be cherished. Let me teach you how to be cherished by your husband.” I teach women how to do this.
Many know know their mind, but they still do this criticism of people around them. They’re criticizing. They complain. They compare. All those three. I call them the disease of the three C’s. Number one is to love yourself. The second one is to heal yourself of the disease of the three C’s because you can with God’s help. The third one is to live a life of service and love others. When you serve others, it’s cyclical. You can’t serve others unless you love others. When you love others, you want to serve them.
As you serve others and you love others, you are loved. It’s a cyclical arrangement, but it’s not lumped in with the first one because I see that there is a difference. You can love yourself. Yes, it does motivate you to serve others. I want to be clear that serving others and giving of yourself without expectation of reward is what motherhood is all about. It’s also what good friends are all about. It’s also what brings great happiness. Those are my three.
You have been an amazing guest, Paula, like I knew you would. You exceeded my expectations. Tell the audience again how can they reach out if they want to be a show host or if they want to know more about your organization.
That’s too easy. It’s WinWinWomen.com. When you go there, then you could click on Become A Show Host. It’s right there on the menu.
You’re doing many things to change the world, one woman at a time. When I say one woman at a time, it’s bringing in one expert to help get the message out there for whatever that women are in great need of. What does Dr. Paula Fellingham need?
Do you remember Miss Congeniality, the movie? This just came to mind because I don’t get asked this very often. It was a joke, but they said world peace. I want all of us to pray for that because as we are lifting up our voices in our hearts, then I believe that miracles can happen. As we work at doing our parts toward that, I do believe that when we are of one heart, one voice, and one mind, then we will be able to increase that level of love, prosperity, and peace on Earth.
My dear friend and partner, thank you so much for coming on the show. You’ve exceeded all my expectations. I would love to have you back because you have many different words of wisdom and experience. Let’s have Paula back on. Thank you so much. Thank you for your spirit. Thank you for your generosity. Thank you for everything.
I loved it.
A big thank you to my audience. We can’t have a show without you. I know you’re going to love this episode. Please share it with your friends, your network, your community, your employees and fellow coworkers. Make sure you subscribe and go check out Win Win Women, and International Women’s Day. Participate. Be a blessing to someone else like Dr. Paula Fellingham has been a blessing to all of us. Thank you. Until next time.
- WIN WIN Women
- Become A Show Host
- Sex and World Peace
- Women of Excellence Women of Faith
- Exit Rich
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